Author · Chief Innovation Officer
For thirty years I was the guy with the answers. Then the answers stopped being enough.
I write and talk about the beliefs we don't notice we're living by, and what happens when one of them quits working. I'm still figuring a lot of it out. That's kind of the point.
DECEMBER 1, 2026
The Alignment Project
You're doing everything you're supposed to do. You're working harder than ever. And somehow you're more tired, not less.
This book is about what's usually underneath that: what we've quietly put our trust in, how we drift from it without noticing, and what changes when effort starts coming from trust instead of fear.
The question underneath everything I write
What did you used to believe that you don't anymore?
Before I wrote Built for the Fight, I put two lists on paper. One was the beliefs holding me back. The other was what I wanted to be true. I prayed the second list every morning and every night, and for a while I didn't believe a word of it. About two weeks in, I started to think it might be possible.
Every book since has started the same way, with a belief I had to let go of.
Common Ground
Essays from the middle of it
Each one starts with something I'm wrestling with and follows it until I see it differently. Free, in your inbox.
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Topics, a short bio, and the story behind the book are all on one page.
DECEMBER 1, 2026
The Alignment Project
Why trying harder stops working
Available December 1. Preorders open soon. Subscribe to Common Ground and you can read the first chapter right now.
You're doing everything you're supposed to do. You show up. You work hard. You try to do the right thing at home and at work. And somehow it keeps getting heavier.
The usual advice is to push harder, get more disciplined, find a better system. Sometimes that works. But there comes a point where more effort just makes you more tired, and you can't figure out why.
I hit that point as a technology executive whose whole identity was being the smartest guy in the room. This book is what I found on the other side of it: how we drift from what we trust without noticing, why exhaustion is often a clue rather than a character flaw, and what changes when effort comes from trust instead of fear.
I'm a Christian, and that shapes how I see all of this. You don't need to share my faith to find yourself in these pages.
“The Alignment Project names the ache so many believers carry, the holy restlessness that is often God calling, not our failure. A timely message the men and women need to hear.”
Linda Francisco, daughter of Pastor George Westlake
Books & Writing
Books
Built for the Fight
The battle to become the man you were created to be
Perseverance, responsibility, faith, and the lessons difficulty teaches. Written for the man I was: burned out, under pressure, and pretending to be fine.
The Alignment Project
Why trying harder stops working
For anyone who's been doing everything right and still can't find rest. December 1, 2026.
Next: The Reality Lens (working title), in development.
Writing
Common Ground
Common Ground is where I work things out in public. Most essays start with something small: a conversation, a frustration, a verse that wouldn't leave me alone. I follow it until I see it differently, and then I write down what changed.
Some of them land. Some of them I'd write differently now. That's part of it.
Archive
From 2023 to 2026 I hosted DadMode, 78 conversations about fatherhood, faith, and responsibility. The episodes are on YouTube.
For podcast hosts
Thanks for considering me for your show.
Everything you need is on this page. If something's missing, ask and I'll get it to you.
The story behind the book
For thirty years my value was being the smartest guy in the room. Technology moves too fast for anyone to keep up, and I got to the point where I was spending more energy defending myself than leading. The answer wasn't trying harder. It was hiring people smarter than me. That meant letting go of the idea that I had to be the one with the answers, and letting go of some people who'd been loyal to me. Loyalty is a big deal to me. It was the hardest thing I'd done as a leader. But once better people were carrying what I used to carry, I got to do what I was actually built for. I still struggle to ask for help. I've also learned it's freeing.
Topics
- The smartest guy in the room, in the age of AIWhat happens to people whose worth is built on knowing more, now that knowing more is cheap.
- Why trying harder stops workingThe point where effort makes things worse, and what to do instead.
- Asking for help when your identity is being capableWhy it's so hard for leaders, fathers, and high performers, and what it gave me.
- What I used to believe that I don't anymoreFaith, work, and family, told as changed beliefs rather than lessons.
- Fighting for your family when you're running on emptyPerseverance and responsibility for fathers under pressure, from Built for the Fight and 78 DadMode conversations.
Questions that work well
- When did you realize trying harder had stopped working?
- What was it like to hire people smarter than you?
- Why is asking for help so hard for guys like us?
- What does "alignment" mean in plain English?
- What's a belief you used to hold that you've let go of?
- What did you learn from 78 conversations with dads?
Short bio
Mike Tobias is Chief Innovation Officer at Human Coalition and a former entrepreneur who ran his first company in his twenties. For most of his career his value was being the smartest guy in the room, until technology moved faster than he could and trying harder stopped working. His latest book, The Alignment Project: Why Trying Harder Stops Working (December 1, 2026), is about what he found on the other side: asking for help, trusting other people, and the faith underneath both. His first book, Built for the Fight, is about perseverance, responsibility, and faith under pressure. He writes the Common Ground essays on Substack, is a father of six and grandfather of eight, and lives in North Texas.
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About
I've spent most of my life building things.
I started as an engineer doing technical support and sales. In my twenties, I became president of that company through a buyout with older partners. Eventually I left because we had different ideas about where the business should go.
Today I'm Chief Innovation Officer at Human Coalition.
For a long time my value was being the smartest guy in the room. It worked until it didn't. Technology moves too fast for anyone to keep up, and I found myself defending more than leading. Learning to hire people better than me, and to ask for help, is still the most important thing I've learned at work. I'm still learning it.
I've always had a habit of seeing connections between things that don't seem related. Sometimes that's helpful. Sometimes I make so many connections that I lose the point I'm trying to make. Writing has taught me to slow down and figure out which ones matter.
I write because it's how I find out what I actually believe. If I can't explain something clearly, I probably don't understand it yet. Writing, teaching, and the conversations that follow are how I learn.
I'm a Christian. It shapes how I see everything, including the questions I don't have answers to. A lot of what I write comes from reconsidering things I thought I understood about God and life. You don't have to share my faith to find something useful here.
I'm a husband, a father of six, and Pops to eight. Everything else builds from there.